Homeschooling Through the Holidays
Summary:
Are you struggling to find a balance between homeschooling and the holiday season? In this episode of Show Me Homeschool, hosts Erin and Joe share their experiences and tips on homeschooling through the holidays while keeping it light and stress-free. They emphasize the importance of focusing on building family relationships, creating holiday traditions, and allowing flexibility in the academic schedule during the busy holiday season. Listeners will gain valuable strategies and inspiration to navigate homeschooling through the holidays while fostering a joyful and peaceful atmosphere for their families.
Links and Resources:
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Transcript:
Erin [00:00:00]:
Hello, and thank you for listening to Show Me Homeschool, the podcast. Joe and I are gonna talk today about homeschooling through the holidays and how we keep it light and stress free as much as it depends on us.
Joe [00:00:15]:
Stress free. That's funny.
Erin [00:00:18]:
Well, we know that during the holidays, obviously, there's a lot of stress that can be involved with all the extra prep, the family either coming and going to their house or you there coming to your house,
Joe [00:00:32]:
A 1000000 parties.
Erin [00:00:33]:
A lot of things going on in the calendar. If your kids are part of coop, there's performances, or if they're a part of dance or sports, there's tournaments.
Joe [00:00:43]:
Did you sign up for these treats? Did you bring them? Did you make it to Storage you bake in time?
Erin [00:00:47]:
Right. Or maybe you're the person leading the thing and you have a huge task list ahead of you and It really cuts into what's happening academically, and we just want to tell you that's okay. We have found over the past 12 years homeschooling gluing our family, that we have taken more and more time off the academics throughout December, the longer we've done it. Yep. And what used to happen was I would feel behind on where we were in the books.
Joe [00:01:22]:
Right. Because you kinda consider this like the half year mark.
Erin [00:01:25]:
Right. Mostly. So I would feel like we didn't get as far in math or we didn't get as far in reading or whatever it was. We didn't do enough of these experiments, whatever. And I would start feeling really, really stressed, but then I wanted to be the fun mom and have parties, go to parties, meet up with friends, go to the ballet.
Joe [00:01:47]:
Well, and I don't you, I think you're kind of selling yourself short as calling yourself just the fun mom, you, And and I, we've had discussions about where we not want to just have fun, but we want to create, you know, golden memories for our kids and Traditions. Mhmm. Holiday traditions, that they can look back and, you know, they're just treasured memories, stuff that maybe they don't wanna do with their family someday or things that they can come back home and keep doing. So, you know, I think you wanna Mhmm. I wanna emphasize that, that you're more than just being a fun mom, you're trying to really create that atmosphere.
Erin [00:02:28]:
Right. Well, and I think in creating those traditions. You want to have fun. You don't want to be stressing over this art project and this event that we were supposed to go to and we have to get all dressed and everybody, you know, we're looking for clothes and people are yelling and we're getting in the car, and by the time everybody's strapped in their seats, Everybody's angry or frustrated or sad or upset or doesn't even want to go to the event. And we've had years like that where it was extremely, you know, and I think the driver in that a lot of times comes from my, pressure that I put on myself to make those things memorable and fun, and, you know, that can create a lot of stress for the rest of the family.
Joe [00:03:12]:
Right. It's like you said, you were, I think what you're doing in the past or had done in the past and me included, because I sometimes set the pressure high as well, is You were trying to do, or we were trying to do too much. Mhmm. All of the holiday stuff that we just talked about from, you know, around mid thanks or I'm sorry, mid November, which is starting to get prepped and stuff for Thanksgiving all through December, obviously. Trying to basically keep the same academic schedule or other homeschool activities On top of all those other things, and it's just like you said, to anyone listening is giving you permission to Release that stuff, to allow yourself the flexibility and the freedom to back off what you need to back off. I think you had mentioned something about, as we're preparing for this episode, where you have learned at this point to, Look at the things that we typically do, the traditions that we have, the activities that we are important to our family during this season. You basically schedule those and put those on the calendar first and then you start working And also, getting together with family and other stuff, and then you work around that.
Erin [00:04:38]:
Mhmm. Yeah. So what I started doing because we also have a child with a December birthday. And I've historically been the person in the family, our family has been the host of Thanksgiving and Christmas for our extended family for most of our marriage, and having that pressure, I just kind of clicked for me 1 year, that instead of focusing on planning all these academic things to do during this time that I would bulk up on the academic things towards the beginning or the end of the year, and then really focus on building the relationships. Because truly we have to remember, especially when we're stressed We have a lot of things on our to do list. The reason that we're homeschooling is to build relationship. And what faster way to tear down relationships than putting a bunch of pressure or stressors on our family in a time that's really busy during the year and busy with good things and relational things, so it's almost, it's not that you're not teaching your children during this time, but the Focus is more on the interpersonal relationships. It's on hospitality.
Erin [00:05:48]:
It's on serving others, and that in and of itself is just equally as important as the academics. So that's a whole mindset shift for a lot of us when we're homeschooling because, we, we tend to put homeschool mom or homeschool dad before we put mom or dad, and we can't let homeschool get in the way of parenting, and that's sometimes what we tend to do. So some of the things that have worked for us, like we said, is adjusting our expectations of what the end of Thanksgiving towards the beginning of the next year, January, and really looking back and reflecting on like what has worked well for us this here, what have we accomplished in our books? And holding onto that and saying, okay, we aren't as far as we think We are from our goal, and every step we're taking is still towards the goal of educating our children, but this is the facet we're focusing on during the holidays.
Joe [00:06:54]:
Agreed.
Erin [00:06:59]:
So we've kind of covered a few tips for balancing holidays and homeschooling already. You know, managing our time well by focusing on the events, the handful. And what we do is I'll ask each of our kids, you know, at the end of November, middle of November and say, what's one thing that you guys wanna do over the holidays, and it could be as simple as I wanna have our friends over one day, or I really like to make these cookies that you make, or I really want to see the Nutcracker ballet or whatever that one thing is, and then each, Each kid kind of has their ability to do that with us. It's really tempting right now to see all these wonderful products being launched by creators and, curriculum companies, and I, I really, really can't say this enough. Baking cookies with your kids does not need a unit study wrapped around it.
Joe [00:07:57]:
Right.
Erin [00:07:57]:
It's very tempting to think that we have to make everything hyper educational and hyper focused on what, what are they learning? Because I have to count this for school and, you know, that would be an instance where homeschool mom is getting in the way of mom. So, Joe, do you want to talk a little bit about your role during this season of holiday and how sometimes you've talked to me away from planning too much or, you know, because I am the person who typically fills the calendar.
Joe [00:08:31]:
Yep. And you, you do like to really fill it up. So, I think Like most things in our marriage, we balance each other out. You like to really fill things up and I Sometimes look and go, you know, I I just, I can't make that. Or are you sure the boys want to go to this? And you go, well, maybe not. So I kind of balance you out with those things. I think for me is, I At least looking back on like this last Thanksgiving when we hosted is once again, really Being there to support you. So if I'm as soon as I'm done with work or if there's any possibility of me getting off early or taking vacation, I'm doing that.
Joe [00:09:22]:
And then I'm helping immediately helping around the house. I'm helping clean. I'm helping the other kids Get their act together on chores. We're playing with our youngest because she's, you know, quality time and We're really just very busy and and needs to be supervised, so I'd step in as The husband and do whatever needs to be done so that you're not going crazy. Mhmm.
Erin [00:09:52]:
Well, I think that that's the thing and the key is having those conversations, not just like, hey kids, what do you want to do this season? But you and I have that conversation about what does our schedule look like. We have a shared calendar that we both look at. You add things to it, I add things to it so that we can kind of look at the week and balance out if we're going to be gone 2 or 3 nights, then the weekend needs to be less full, not scheduling 2 or more activities in the same day if possible.
Joe [00:10:21]:
Right. It might be me getting the kids to certain activities, like our youngest is wanting to, daddy, are you going to make it to my Christmas performance at our co op and making sure that I get there?
Erin [00:10:36]:
Mhmm. But also remembering too that a lot of times with the one income, some dads are not able to make it to everything. And I think that there's Obviously that desire is there for you to participate as much as you can in all of the fun activities and the memory making things, but there's nothing wrong also with mom making some memories with the kids or having special things that we just do or same with you. Sometimes you'll just take them to do whatever the special thing is for our family and I am doing something else or taking that time to rest because I have been very busy hosting or cooking or cleaning and doing extra things besides just the day to day running of the house.
Joe [00:11:16]:
Right. I think when it comes to To dads and and husbands, obviously. They're supposed to be leading the family. So and I'm not great at this. But trying to Be the or or have a lookout and be observing what is the condition of my home emotionally and mentally at the moment is Are we are we scheduling too much? Are we doing too much? Is are some things going off the rails? And maybe putting the brakes on or trying to get things back on the rails. So I think I have tried to be really cognizant of everyone's emotional and mental state as the holidays start to ramp up And, you know, try to discuss with you and say, look, Aaron, it seems like you're really stressed. Just Let that go. You know, it's gonna be fine.
Joe [00:12:15]:
We've the kids aren't really enjoying it anymore or, Hey. Where are the hours at? And I'm able to help you take a step back and get perspective and again, operate more so out of rest instead Trying to throw everything at these 2 months. Mhmm.
Erin [00:12:35]:
And I think this is a great opportunity during the Thanksgiving Christmas season to lean into your homeschool community, because that's really what A lot of the things are filling up our calendar with, you know, the, the performance ad co op with our friends and their families and having Christmas parties, with our local support group. And sometimes in years past, I've said no to those things because we didn't get enough time put into academics. And I was so focused on that, that It was a detriment to our family in a sense because our kids weren't being able to make those connections. So we really just wanted to encourage you today. This episode will be coming out in a couple of, days here, and as we're entering into more of a busier time. I just wanted to really, and Joe as well, encourage you to really take stock of what, why you're homeschooling. Maybe reflect on that a little bit more.
Joe [00:13:45]:
And the freedom that comes with, during the holidays.
Erin [00:13:48]:
Yes. The freedom that you have and think through maybe 2 or 3 areas that have gone really well and kinda take a little bit of time to reflect on homeschooling. And I'll throw this in here as well. Sometimes this time of year is really stressful and it has nothing to do with homeschooling, but we're just about into 2 years since we've lost to my mom and she passed away at the end of December and was in the hospital throughout much of December and the stress and the trauma of that whole circumstance of her has really, taken a toll. And so, you know, as I'm saying all of these things to remember, I'm having to remember them myself because I can tend, and I know that other women that I've talked to and other families that homeschool, Holidays aren't always fun and they're not always full of cheer and joy and excitement. Sometimes they're full of grief and sadness and we're pushing through a lot just to do the basic things, and I just Want you to hear my heart too, that if you don't have the energy to go and take, or the emotional energy or the capability mentally to handle all of the holiday buzz. Just do the things that bring your family peace that are simple, that you can do at home. It doesn't mean you have to leave your house every day to go do something.
Erin [00:15:17]:
Doesn't mean you have to do all these crafts. Maybe it's as simple as watching your favorite Christmas movie or just sitting together in the living room and talking and having a hot chocolate or something. It doesn't always have to be this major huge thing, and I know that especially last Christmas was our first, Well, actually, I mean, this will be our 3rd Christmas because she just passed away, without my mom, and she was pivotal to what we did at the holidays. And, I know that some of you listening are hurting or grieving or processing still, and, I just really want to speak to you in this moment of taking time to do that.
Joe [00:16:00]:
To give yourself permission Yeah. To grief. To grief. To, like you said, set maybe set boundaries, and say no To things and even if that's family, you know, that's, that's still here. If it's too much And it causes more stress or, I mean, God forbid, trauma to your kids because you're yelling or, You know, you're, you're ruining things that should be memories and traditions. I mean nothing's worth That you gotta, you've got to operate out of peace and rest instead.
Erin [00:16:38]:
Yeah. And not I don't want to end on a heavy note here, but I do wanna just, we could talk a little bit about something that we've Don. What are what are a few things that our family really enjoys over the holidays that are just simple things that we do and low cost?
Joe [00:16:58]:
So something we've done for a long time is, a journey to Judea. A local Church body, creates, it's outside. And it's, You you basically go through the Old Testament and then some of the New Testament, like physically walking through, Oh, the the the lineage of Jesus and then His His birth and then, His life and then His death on the cross and resurrection. But they, that church body has, people in costumes. Help me out here.
Erin [00:17:42]:
They have a whole nativity setup. They have everything. It's done really well. Yeah. It's done really well and it's free, and we always try to sign up and get tickets, just to reserve our spot. And it's something that kinda I feel like sets the tone for the season and
Joe [00:17:58]:
We'll physically walk through and hear scripture rather than have things described and Especially for our kids being able to,
Erin [00:18:06]:
visualize. Yes. Mhmm. Yeah. And it's great for the whole family, you know, any age and Stage of Life can benefit from it. So that's one thing we like to do. And, another is there's just the Christmas lights display set up at a local community college, like, there's a a lake and they have where you can drive your car through and enjoy and listen. So we do that with some hot chocolate.
Erin [00:18:28]:
Just some simple things that don't take a lot of time that are close by, that our kids all enjoy and will probably do until they don't offer those activities anymore. We always, you know, there's certain movies that we just watch every year. It's a Wonderful Life, Christmas Story, those kinds of things and pop popcorn and sit around and do that. We just, we really do try to keep it as simple as possible. But yet still doing community things, you know, going to our co ops, performances and hanging out with our friends
Joe [00:19:04]:
and Thanksgiving.
Erin [00:19:05]:
We
Joe [00:19:06]:
posted this last year.
Erin [00:19:07]:
Yeah. Doing puzzles, you know, not everything needs to be super thought out or, you know, curriculum based or anything. It really just can be very basic. So we just wanna encourage you, Hope you have a great Christmas, and we will be back next week with another episode.