Encouraging, Empowering and Equipping Mothers with Christina Carpenter

Summary:

Have you ever attended a conference or workshop on homeschooling or motherhood? Did you leave feeling rested and ready to continue this journey of motherhood and home education? Today, Erin welcomes Christina Carpenter of Authentic Joy in the Journey to the podcast. Christina is the co-founder of the Bloom & Blossom Conference whose primary goals are to encourage, empower and equip mothers to promote a love of learning in the home, to cultivate relationship, and to spark wonder in their families.

Through their conversation, you’ll gain practical tips and guidance on balancing academics with relationships, creating a strong family culture, involving husbands in homeschooling, and reevaluating visions and choices. Whether you're a new homeschooling parent or have been on this journey for years, this episode of Show Me Homeschool will equip and inspire you to thrive in your homeschooling and motherhood journey.

Resources and Links:

Authentic Joy in the Journey, personalized coaching and consulting with Christina Carpenter

Bloom & Blossom Conference for Mothers, Feb. 23-24, 2024 in Springfield, MO.

Episode sponsored by Podcast with Faith, www.podcastwithfaith.com

Connect with Erin and Joe at Show Me Homeschool:
Show Me Homeschool Website
On Instagram, @show.me.homeschool
On Pinterest, @showmehomeschool

Be sure to leave a rating and review, and subscribe so you never miss an episode! For questions or comments email us: info@showmehomeschool.com

Transcript:

Erin: Hi. Welcome back to show me homeschool. Today we have our very first guest. Her name is Christina Carpenter. She's the founder of both authentic Joy in the Journey and Bloom and Blossom Conference. As a home educating mother of four, she understands the complexities and challenges that life brings. She feels passionate about developing a strong vision and mission for your homeschool, curating an atmosphere that promotes family culture and helping others bloom on their home education and motherhood journey. Through personalized coaching sessions, workshops, public speaking, and the Bloom and Blossom Conference, she aspires to equip, encourage, empower and inspire.

Erin: So Christina is not just a guest. She is one of my really good friends and we actually met. Do you want to tell them a little bit about our origin story?

Christina: Yeah. So I love this story. So we met online. I like to just start off saying that we met online. It sounds know we swiped right. But what happened was I a conference for home educating mothers and I was looking for ways to kind of promote that. And I was looking on Facebook and I found Erin on here on a different podcast site. And I was like, OK, she's in the Kansas City area, I need to get the word out there. And I was looking through all of her stuff on that site and I was like, we have the same goal. And so I just reached out to her privately and just asked if she wouldn't mind sharing some of the conference information. And honestly, since then we've basically been friends.

Erin: Yes, I love that. And I love that about you. You have a boldness and a richness of heart that you reach out to other women and you're so encouraging. And so it makes total sense the business that you're in of encouraging and equipping other moms. So why don't you tell us? Let's start with a little bit about you and how you got into homeschooling and your family.

Christina: All right, well, that was super sweet of you to say. Thank you. Okay, so I am a mother of four children. I have a 16 year old daughter, a twelve year old son, an eleven year old, and a nine year old daughter. Everybody just had a birthday this summer, and so it feels like a whirlwind. When the last kid had a birthday, I was like, yes, but honestly, I've always home educated. We're going on on like, our twelveTH or 13th year of home education. Real quick backstory. I'm actually from Washington State, and I moved here to Missouri when I was 20, and I did not know a single person that home educated. And I was talking with the French. She's still a dear friend to this day. And her daughter was a little older than mine, and she was telling me that she had planned to home educate her little girl at the time, and she was like three, and so my daughter would have been about one. And I was just shocked. I was like, you can do that. I didn't even know that existed. But right then and there, I decided that that's what I was going to do. I was going to be a home educating mother. And it's been a great journey ever since.

Erin: I love that. I like how you have a lot of stories, I feel like, of random meetings of other people, and then you're like, yes, I love what they're doing. We're going to do this together. And you are just such a team player. I love that about you. So not only do you home educate your children, but as you said earlier, you have started not just coaching other moms. If you want to start there, we'll start with coaching. Or we could talk about your conference. Which do you prefer?

Christina: Okay, so they seriously go hand in hand, so we could start anywhere with that. But basically, if you look at the logo that I have, it is a compass on one side and then flowers on the other. So the flowers are kind of representing that bloom and blossom, which is that conference. And then the compass part is that coaching part, which is Authentic Join the Journey. And so both of these things that I direct and founded, they both have the same mission, and that's to encourage, equip, and inspire and empower mothers, specifically on their home education and motherhood journey. But through blue and blossom, that's more of like a larger scale. So that's more of like, conferences and larger workshops. But the authentic Join the Journey, that's more of the coaching, smaller workshops, public speaking. And I'm also writing a book called Authentic. Join the journey.

Erin: Yes. I love it. So what inspired you to transition just from homeschooling, your kids being a part of the homeschool community as a peer to then taking on a leadership and mentoring role within the homeschool community?

Christina: That is a very loaded question. It is, but I'm like, how long do we have? I'm going to paraphrase that a little bit more. So I'm trying to think where to start with that. Where should we start? During my journey of home educating and my motherhood journey, there had been some internal trials within myself that I was kind of processing through and then some external trials that I was going through. And during that, both of those circumstances really challenged the vision that I had for my home school and for, honestly, my motherhood journey. And so through those trials, I was able to sharpen and refine what I wanted. What did I want to do, what was that vision that I had? And through that, I started seeing other people too, that they had a vision and they were having a really hard time accomplishing that vision. And so I was like, what is going on here? And honestly, motherhood is under attack. Even home education, a lot of people don't understand what that looks like and how it's tied to our family culture. And so through that, again, very paraphrased version of that, I just started talking with families and through that it just kind of progressed to where it is now, to where it's like now people reach out to me and this is what I get to do as a job. And it's so fun, it's so fulfilling. I love it. I love hearing the heart of all of these families. I work with both parents, but primarily it is mothers. And it's amazing to hear where they're at. And honestly, it's a little bit more like counseling because I don't sit down and give you a few suggestions. I want to hear where is your heart? Where are you struggling? When was the last time you cried? I want to hear all of those things and I want to walk beside you and help get you to the goal that you have in mind to reach that vision and to thrive on both your motherhood and home education journey.

Erin: I love that. That's amazing that you were able to do that. And I love how God has taken the trials in your life and used them to glorify him really through building relationship with other women. I know I've talked with other homeschool moms about coaching and that's something I'm just starting to do. But you've got a lot of experience in doing that. And I've heard some people say, well, I don't really need a coach. And I'm like, well, that's true. I think some people, if you've got a solid friend group and you've got people in your corner and you've got that community, but a lot of people don't have that and they haven't really understood that. Like you said, coaching is not just here. I'm going to listen to your problem and I'll give you these five things to do, but it really is walking alongside the mom and the relationship. So can you talk a little bit about kind of your style and what you feel or see happening within the homeschool community as far as friendships and the lack of those things that make something like coaching a real necessity for people?

Christina: Yeah. So I just want to say real quick, yes to God be the glory. I have walked through lots of trials and through that he has definitely refined a lot of areas in my life and I still obviously am on the path for growth. But to address what you were saying before with my style and just it being a necessity. Yeah. It's so much more than coaching. It's so much more than just giving, like you said, a few suggestions of like this is a good reading program and this isn't or it's getting to the heart behind what somebody's doing and just walking them through how they can accomplish their vision and their mission. And so my personal style, I kind of call myself a little bit of like it's mentorship coaching. So that mentorship is where I'm your friend, I'm here with you. Mentorship is more of hey, I've been there, I've done that, I've experienced that hard thing and this is what happened and this is how this turned out. Here are some suggestions to walk through that and that's that mentorship relational side of it. And then the coaching side is helping somebody accomplish a goal. And honestly, to coach, you don't really have to have played the game. You can understand the rules, but you don't really have to play the game. It helps, obviously, but with the coaching, that's where in our sessions or in our workshops, I will always give you a call to action. I don't want to just sit around and talk about the things. It's like, okay, let's talk about this and then let's have a game plan. And even in my book, at the end, I have a call to action because that's what it's about. It's moving towards growth. How can we be better in these areas and better ourselves and then link arms with other women and walk alongside them on their journey as well?

Erin: Yes, I love that leading from know part of what Joe and I really want to do with Show Me Homeschool is there's the coaching piece. But we really have a heart for people in leadership arena within the homeschool community because as we've been in that position of leadership through different organizations and volunteering, we see a need and a burnout that happens. So there's the one side of the home school burnout, but then when it comes to leadership and that support, can you talk a little bit about your role within your local community as a leader through your conference?

Christina: Yeah. Also I want to address real quick. I think what you and Joe are doing and what you have started is fantastic. I love it. If this is the first episode that you guys have listened to, I highly recommend you go and listen to their other episodes. They are so transparent and authentic. They have encountered a lot of hardships and trials and they have just walked through it gracefully. And they are just here to be like, with open arms to just help lead you guys. So definitely recommend listening to their other episodes. What I love so much about Erin is that we are on the same team and even though we do something very similar, we're like team players, right? She's like my teammate. And I love this. I love this idea of like, hey, I see that you're leading over here and I don't want to be in competition with you. We have the same goal, which is to equip and encourage and empower. And so let's work together. And so I love that about you. So as far as what that looks like in my community, the conference is really about that equipping, encouraging and empowering. And the conference side of it really is community building. So I really try to have most of the vendors that come to the conference be home, educating family that are also vendors that either have a product or a service to sell. So that way it's pouring back into the home education community. Also, I have a Facebook page, Bloom and Blossom Community, and it's just a place for people to make connections, to say funny jokes, to ask questions. But a lot of times people are posting about things that are happening in the community and they're like, oh, I didn't even know that was happening. And so it's just another opportunity to consistently just try to build that community within our own community, but also extend that even further because even within our own state, there's a lot of things that are going on where it's like, yeah, I'm going to come up for that. So, like, in Kansas City in your area, there's another group called the Flourish Team and went to their it was like a mini event. It was their launch and it was fantastic. It was a time for mothers just to be encouraged and equipped. And it was nice for me to be able to go and hear that. Yeah. So that's how I'm using that conference to do that.

Erin: Yes. And I was able to come to the conference for the first time last year. And I'm a chronic, like, I love a good conference. Give me a girls weekend or a girls event to be built up and encouraged, especially if it involves like one of my favorite topics is home education or just a fun time to relax with other women who are in the same stage of life as I am. And just that commiseration, but not in a negative way, but it's more of like a camaraderie. So back to the piece about being a leader in the homeschool community. What are some of the trends that you are seeing when it comes either to how people are home educating, what the needs of the community are, just some of the things that you've observed through your coaching, what are some things happening that we should be aware of?

Christina: That's a good question. So in our area, home education has exploded same. And so I think the need is really great for there to be communities and programs that fit different stages of life and that support the supplemental educational part on top of the relational. So for example, you see a lot of programs that are just like this is purely educational and you see a lot of ones that are like this is purely social. And so just kind of having a blend of those where people can feel like hey, this is a community, but I'm also getting the support here educationally. So classical conversations, international program, they do a really good job at that. Not all people are wanting to walk down that path with classical conversations or are they able to afford it. And so it's just nice to have other opportunities and programs and communities pop up that are doing that. And honestly, I have consulted with several in my area and just kind of help them curate something that's like hey, how can it be supplemental here, enrichment over here, still educational on top of still having that social side. And that is the biggest need that I am seeing.

Erin: I would agree. I don't know. I was talking with a friend earlier and we were kind of going through what we see a lot of questions on social media from a lot of newer home educators are really trying. They focus so much on finding that academic piece to fill the void of what they left with either public or private school, that they get so burnt out just solely focusing on that academic piece because they've then put themselves back in a position of still doing what someone else is telling them to do educationally for their child, instead of having that confidence to teach those classes on their own. Especially when those kids are like five, six, seven years old, where in our state that's not even compulsory age. But finding that support like you're talking about is so important for those moms and dads to not just seek out one of those pillars of academic or just a social club or just for moms, but to wrap those pieces together so they're in a little pretty bow and kind of having all that support. Because that's where I see a lot of especially newer homeschoolers burn out, is when they just have the academic piece, but they haven't focused either on the relational aspect with moms like friendships or their kids having friendships. It can be kind of one sided. So we have to balance that. And I love that you speak to that as a leader in the homeschool community, because I think that that's such a vital part of that lifestyle of home education is that relational piece with the academic. And I would say, and I think you would probably agree, I don't know I'm going to speak for you, but that the relational piece is actually the more important part of that choice.

Christina: Absolutely. Also to speak to what you were saying with that burnout. What I'm seeing is that the people that have been home educating maybe for a few years and their kids are no longer four, five, six, and their oldest is now like 910 and eleven, but yet they still have like a seven, six, and maybe a three year old. That's where they're experiencing that burnout because it's like, okay, I've been doing this academic, straight academic, but now I have two other kids that are coming up. What does this actually look like? And that's the important part of having a coach, to be like, hey, let's sit down, let's reevaluate what your vision is. And are you walking that out to be able to accomplish that? Are you making life giving choices that are propelling you towards your vision? Or is it taking away from your vision? And so that's really important, especially as it gets into high school. Like, as you know, with having a teenager, sometimes your vision can be a little rocked because now you have teenagers and they have their own vision. And so there always needs to be a reevaluation of your choices just to make sure that it's a good fit for everybody. And I don't mean like you need to reevaluate every year. If home education is a good fit, that's a good choice as well. But what I mean is just like, maybe what program, what curriculum you're doing. You have some introverts and maybe they don't like when you're running them all around or maybe you have some extroverts and they're like, hey, I really would like to be included more in some of these other programs or whatever to have some more social time. So just reevaluating your people and looking at them like individual people that they are.

Erin: Yeah, absolutely. I 100% agree with that. So I want to go back to that idea of helping women create a really strong mother culture and not having that fall by the wayside, because the weight of making those academic choices and trying to focus on the relational piece. And sometimes we don't really feel like it personally because there's a lot going on. I know, you know, but I haven't really shared with our audience this yet, but just losing my mom almost two years ago, it really has shifted my perspective in a lot of ways about things that are important. That vision for home education that I had when we started going back to that, it was a reminder to me that I wanted to spend more time with my kids and I know that was something that my mom also really valued. She would say all the time, I'll do anything for my family. That was kind of her catchphrase. And so can we talk a little bit about how we've started out, the conversation? That mother culture, that seeing other women doing good things and helping other women, and we're part of the same team. This isn't a competition with what co op you go to or what curriculum you use or what your method is. Let's talk about that.

Christina: Yeah. So one of the main things that I talk to women about specifically, if they are just starting out, and I talk about this some in my book too, is that the motherhood journey and the home education journey are actually the same journey. They're not two paths that are running parallel. They're the same journey. But I think a lot of times we like to put on a hat and be like, okay, now I'm in teacher mode. Okay, now I'm in mother mom mode. But you wear those hats at the same time, and so it's necessary to take care of both of those things to accomplish that vision that you have.

Erin: Yeah. So how do you find ways to do that? Do you talk about that in your book as well?

Christina: I do talk about that. I'll give you a few spoilers. One of the things that I feel really strongly about is to create a strong family culture. I definitely think that that will overflow into other parts of your life, is just making sure that when you have home education as a lifestyle versus just something you do, then it makes that journey easier. And what I'm not saying is I'm not saying that you have to home educate 365 days a year. That's not what I'm saying. Do I do that? Possibly. Okay. But that's just because I like to do, and that's part of our family culture and lifestyle. But that's not what I'm saying when I say lifestyle. I'm saying when you kind of take this on, like, this is kind of who we are and not what we do, it changes your perspective, and it flows into your family culture. And just like you and Joe are both on the same team, I find it really valuable for husbands to be included in this part of the conversation, because a lot of times, especially in my household, my husband jokes that he's the superintendent, and the principal finances me, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I'm the teacher, but I'm doing a majority of the work. Right. He still needs to be on the same page and recognize that this is something that we do, this is our family culture, not something that I just do. And actually, we are leading on our second date night workshop tonight, kind of talking about these things, about how husbands and wives can be united and come together. And one of the things that we really talk about is that family culture on top of creating strong family pillars. And so a pillar can be something, you can have personal pillars, you can have business pillars. And basically those are just like values that you adhere to. But when you start creating pillars for your household, they start becoming something that is a structure that holds up that vision and that mission. And it's something that you can also use as a litmus test or a safeguard or a door, if you will, of like, are we going to let this into our family culture or not? Does it align with these pillars and these values that I have? And if not, then don't let it in. Does that make sense?

Erin: Yeah, I love that visual that you give there because those pillars are going to do that job to hold that foundation in place. And when you step away from that, and I love that you also transitioned into talking about the dads because this is our first episode without Joe on here. But like you said, Joe and I covered that in one of our last episodes about that trust and communication and building that within the homeschool lifestyle that you're building with your family. It's not just my decision to home educate kids, it's not just his. We have to be a team. And within that team, we have different roles that we play and different responsibilities we take on. But making sure that we're checking in with each other to make sure that those pillars you were just talking about are being upheld by the decisions and choices that we're making with the academic things that we're choosing to have our children participate in, as well as the extracurricular things. And how many nights away are we gone? And that time piece of being at home with our kids, it can seem still even some days, if you've done this long enough, that gosh, I've been home all day with my kids and I haven't seen my kids. Have you ever experienced that feeling at the end of the day and it's like, wait a second, then we definitely have done too much outside of building that relationship. So let's talk a little bit then about how do you do that with your husband. You said you offer date night workshops to kind of bring in both the husband and wife into building that relationship. So what does that look like for you and your husband?

Christina: Just real quick to go back to what you were saying about bringing in the dads and stuff, it's really important to be intentional. And I think that extra added intentionality to bring in your husband and to sit down and have those parental roles and expectations for your family culture and your lifestyle, I think it's really foundational. And so how that transitions to our date night workshop. What we do at the date night workshop is I will kind of start it off, because a lot of these women have seen me before. They've talked to me before, at least there may be a client. And so they've heard me speak. They already know the language, the grammar of home education, for the most part, and the men don't. A lot of times the husbands don't know they don't know the difference between Charlotte Mason or Classical. And not that they need to know all of those nuances. But I kind of start off and, like, kind of baseline all the dads to be like, hey, if you hear your wife talking about this, these are some helpful, applicable tips that you can do to kind of be a little bit more involved. And then my husband, he usually talks a little bit more on behaviors and attitudes and techniques and what that looks like. My husband is a straight up data guy. He wants to know, Give me the numbers. How can we make this work? How can we make it better? And so he just goes to the heart of it, like, here, if we do it this way, here's the behaviors, here's the technique, here's the attitude that you need to have to be able to accomplish this over here. And honestly, we both authentically share our victories and our struggles, because through our struggles and our trials, that's where we've been able to come full circle and be able to be like, okay, this is what we did wrong. This is actually a source of friction in our marriage at this time, but this is what this looks like now, and this is what we've learned from it. And so we're just sharing with others. We're experienced sharing, if you will, of how others can learn from our mistakes.

Erin: Yeah, I love that. I wish I could go to one of those workshops and listen to you all together, because I think our husbands haven't met, and so I think they would really enjoy that conversation together because they're very data driven, both of them. So let's go back. Before we wrap up, I would love to talk a little bit more about the upcoming Bloom and Blossom Conference that you're hosting and how people can find information on where to sign up for that. Let's talk about the conference.

Christina: Awesome. I love talking about the conference. So the Bloom and Blossom Conference, we are going on our fourth year. It's February 23 and February 24 of 2024. This year, it's over two days. Is our first year doing that? So that Friday night or Friday afternoon night, it will be like vendor shopping, vendor fair, and workshops, and dads are able to go to those workshops. My husband will have one there as well. And then the next day for the conference, it is just a women attended event. Lap babies are obviously welcome, but it's just for the mamas, and it's just a full day of being poured into. You can go to www.christinacarpenter.org under. The Bloom and Blossom tab to go ahead and register. And right now, we have early bird pricing that goes through October 1. So definitely check that out. Take advantage of that. That early bird pricing does get you into the conference both Friday and Saturday. Also, this year, I will be a keynote, which I'm super excited about. I haven't been a keynote before, but I was like, you know, this year seems like a good year with my book coming out, so I'm super excited about that. And you guys, I have some really exciting news. I have not announced this yet, so this is actually the first time I'm saying it, but Erin is actually going to be our other keynote speaker for Bloom and Blossom. We are super excited to have her.

Erin: I'm so excited. When you asked me to do that, one of the things we didn't mention is that I actually came to a winter workshop that you did this past January and spoke briefly with the ladies. And that was my first taste of what the Blooming Blossom community was like. And what I saw was a group of women who came from all different backgrounds for the common purpose of being an encouragement to each other and to go and be encouraged. And you've really done a great job of building that community. So it was just such an honor for me to be able to be there with your friends and all the people within the community. I don't know if we've said, but you're based out of Springfield, Missouri, and so it's just a short drive, but just going to see what you've accomplished there and not just in your own power. Like you said, God has definitely given you a gift and has blessed you with the ability to network and connect people. So when you asked if I would keynote this year with you, I was first just super honored and humbled that you would ask, but just really excited to get to connect with people that I've begun building relationship to through the other workshop that did okay.

Christina: So, yeah, so when she came down to do that workshop, first of all, Erin is just sweet as can be. She just has this very sweet, poised disposition about her. Like, you just want to tell her all of your things. And she just stood up there and she was just so comfortable, and she was just so authentic, and she shared from her heart. And I just looked around the room and I could just see that the women were really connecting with what she was saying, and I was like, at that point, I had not had any other keynotes. I planned for Bloom Blossom, like, a year ahead, and I just saw that, and I was just, yes, yes, I would love for Erin to do that. And so I talked to my co director, her name is Kelly Taylor about it. I'm like, I really think that Erin would be a really good fit, and so I was like, I'm going to ask her. And then so I did, and she said yes. And honestly, we are so pumped to have you.

Erin: Thank you. I'm really excited about it, too. I can't wait to see what you all come up with this year. I really hope that you can make it. If you're listening and you haven't been to a conference, a Bloom and Blossom conference before, it's amazing. I've been to a lot of conferences and I like each of the ones that I regularly attend for different reasons. But I think the thing that I really like about Bloom and Blossom is just like I said, that community is felt. Everything that you see, from the vendors to the location, to the food, to the swag bags, to whatever we're doing there, it has been thoroughly thought through and planned with your good and your interest in mind so that you can leave encouraged and equipped to continue home, educating your child. So thank you, Christina, for hosting that and really looking forward to it. So how else can we find you on social media? What are the best ways to connect with you?

Christina: Yeah. So you can find me on Instagram and Facebook under authentic joy in the journey. And you can also find me separately. There are two different pages for Bloom and Blossom. It is Bloom and Blossom on Facebook, and then it's Bloom and Blossom conference on Instagram.

Erin: Thank you so much, Christina, for being with us.

Christina: Yeah, thank you so much for having me. I love doing this with you and I love your vision for what you have for the homeschool community and supporting them. So thank you again.

Erin: This episode was sponsored by Podcast with Faith, our favorite Christian podcast production company. For more information, visit them at www.podcastwithfaith.com.

Erin: To learn more about booking one on one or group homeschool coaching sessions with us upcoming events, see our speaking schedule. Or to get access to more resources, be sure to check out our website, www.showmehomeschool.com, and sign up for our weekly newsletter. You can also follow us on Instagram at Show Me Homeschool on Pinterest at homeschool or email us at info@showmehomeschool.com.